Tuesday, April 21, 2009

A Male Chauvinistic Pig Ponders....

Ever since i've decided to get out of this shit hole (popularly known as "job") and go after MBA,i am spending my time in office a bit relaxedly. I may not be the Most deligent worker before,but now, i can feel that my work standards have reduced drastically. 
Here is a list of things i've been doing in office...

1. Reading Garfield strips.

2. Taking "Breaks" in between reading those and having Tea in canteen.

3. Bitching about our boss with other colleagues.

4. Doodling absurd shapes on notebook and calling it "Art"

5. Making awkward talk with female colleagues and fancying myself as a flirt.

6. Thinking about lot of useless stuff.


   Unless u are autistic,the first five are pretty much self explanatory.It is the sixth one that needs some elobaration. and i will do the same...


   I've this weird habit of thinking about stuff that nobody usually bothers about. U can refer to my previous posts for some examples.From past few days, i am observing something interesting happening at my office; there is a non zero chance that it is my hallucination,but you are here reading this crap means u are pretty much wasting ur time anyway,so u've nothing to lose,so Read on....

 Everyday at 13:00 the bus for afternoon shift people comes to my stop.Out of 30 seats in the bus i usually find 33% women. That is 10.The shift ends at 22:30, and in the return bus,as if by potter's magic,there are only 1 or 2 women.Where have all the other women gone? Working overtime in the office?? 

I wish....


 According to Our company's security policy,Female associates are advised to leave the office by 
20:30,so most of them leave by that time.But what they conveniently forget is that they are also supposed to be in the office by 11:30.Yet daily, i see women coming to office by 13:00 bus, i know most of them will be leaving by 20:30,and i can't help but wonder about the implications...


  Ofcourse, i am not saying that every woman bunks her office every day,She might come early 3 days a week,but everyday the ratio is same. 10 women in afternoon bus;1 or 2 in night bus,so on average daily atleast 8 women per bus are hosing our company by working for only 6 hours!


  Our office has 6000 employees,assuming 33% of them are woman,they account to 2000. 
And by conservative estimates,let us assume that half of them are coming by shifts-1000
And half of them are coming in afternoon shifts on any given day - 500

  So effectively,our company is losing 1000 man-hours or should i say,woman-hours per day! That becomes 20000 woman-hours per month.

  that means our efficiency is getting reduced by 2% just because of these women weasles in the office... 

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This is mostly armchair reasoning. It involves pulling numbers out of air and assuming they are true.But since i don't intend to do any real work in the office,i reckon it is best way for me to pass time.( Hold on here for a moment and marvel at my vast vocabulary. On the other hand, if u think that "reckon" is too simple a word,let me know so that i can use more complex words in my next post and be smug about it...)

  Also, this post is intentionally intended to be male chauvinistic. U can argue that men are no better, they take too many breaks, are not sincere,put sick leave whenver there is cricket on Tv,blah blah blah.....but i am too arrogant to pay heed to those views!!
   


1 comment:

RG said...

:)

Making awkward talk with female colleagues and fancying myself as a flirt

idi nenu naa chinnappatinunchi chestunna :P