THE GOLD CLASS MBA

In a revolutionary move that could change the way educational institutes in India function forever, Institute of management technology,Ghaziabad announced a new PGDM program called 'Gold Class' from the next academic year.

In an Email exchange, the esteemed director of the institute explained the rationale behind this strategic move. "There has been always a group of filthy rich retards who just want to get drunk, get wasted, screw around for two years and still receive a PGDM certificate from a prestigious institution. But sadly our educational system doesn't cater to this latent need. Even the students of management quota, popularly known as 'Pauva' entries, are made to work as hard as students who got in by merit. We strongly feel that this defeats the whole point of pauva admissions. Our new program 'Gold Class MBA' addresses these issues. Initially we named the program 'MBA for DUMMIES' but then changed it for the obvious reasons."

Through the 'Gold Class' program(the name apparently inspired by the popular mutiplex jargon), the students will be exempted from the grilling routine of the MBA life. Gold Class students needn't submit any assignments, solve any cases. Unlike students of "ordinary" PGDM, gold class students need to take up only 3 subjects for trimester. The last row of every class is reserved for these students where standard chairs and tables will be replaced by comfy cushions. Every club and committee needs to reserve two seats for the gold class members.

"But the killer feature of this gold class program is.." said the director in a enthusiastic tone," that every member of this gold class program is guaranteed a minimum CGPA of 7.5!"

The institute refused to divulge the fee they are planning to charge for this new course but one anonymous source hinted that it would be "Beyond Obscene".

"Since we already whored out our institute and it's brand name for the sake of immediate profits in many ways, this new program is just another step in the natural direction" the director justified the move by the management.

However, the reaction from the student fraternity was surprisingly mixed.

"OMG OMG! This is totally kewl....", reacted a bimbo," Like, I always wanted to do this MBA thingie, but I am like, dont know anything. Now with this program, I can have a blast for 2 years!WOOHOO"

" I don't see the point,dude. I mean, I heard that the standards of the institute are already in the dust bin. Seriously who gives a fuck if you read the case study or not" questioned a surprisingly well informed aspirant.

"Well. shit happens..." was the laconic reply by a current student of the institute.

"But what about the sanctity of education? Aren't we diluting the standards of education by introducing these programs?? Isn't the future of the next generation, thus the country responsibility of the educational institutes like IMT??" was the final question asked by us.

"LOLFAG!!!" was the cryptic reply we received from the director.

WHY BOOKS ARE INFINITELY MORE AWESOME THAN FRIENDS

1) Easy to acquire

No need to invest time and your emotions to build a relationship. No need to laugh at their stupid jokes and listen to their dumb anecdotes. You buy and the book is yours. Even better, you borrow it,forget that you borrowed it, and the book is yours!

2) Abundance

Seriously, how many interesting people are there around you? your so called 'friends' are probably the dumbest lot who play 'farmville', watch movies like 'Housefull' and post stupid cat videos on their facebook profiles!

On the other hand, I can name 100's of books whose sheer awesomeness will blow you away.

So even mathematics prove the superiority of books. numbers don't lie!!

3) Dispensability

In the unfortunate circumstances that you find a book boring, you can throw it away and read another one! Can u do it with your friends?? Not so easy, is it??You gotta be polite and sneaky as hell to shake him off. And if he can't take the hint, god bless you!

4) Convenience

Books are there for you whenever you are bored. They don't say "Dude, I am busy with stuff. catch you later,bye!" or "Are u out of your mind?? I am shagging this hot chick right now!!!"

And it's much easier to shut down a book and do your work than shaking off an intruding friend.

5) Barter

If somebody got a better or more interesting book, u can always loan it or exchange it with yours. Try that with your friends, and I am sure that awkward confrontations will ensue....

6) Fear of rejection

In every relationship, somebody trades up and the other trades down. It's very rare to find an equal. So, there is always a chance that your awesome friend will treat you as shit. Even if he doesn't show it, he probably thinks you are a retarded moron. May be he blogs about it, who knows?

But on the other hand, even the world's most awesomest book wouldn't act all snobbish in your hands. Once you acquire it, it's your bitch for life!

To sum up, the only reason you may want to maintain a friend is

A) If you are planning to shag his hot sister.

B) If that friend of yours is a girl and you don't want to mess up the .0000000000001 chance of shagging her.

Twitterbugs

I've this feeling that some of you are feeling let down by the lack of slander,virulence and venom in few of my previous posts. Let me assure that I am as Scroogish as ever. Infact, I've became more cynical and I hate this world with more rigor and aggression. And to prove my point, here is a post full of misguided arrogance, gross generalization and incredulous insensitivity.

Have fun!

I hate facebook. It's full of retards who think they are being 'kewl'. Whenever I see my acquaintances playing farmville, mafiawars or some other retarded dumbfuck game, or share yet another mind numbing application like 'friend of the day', I feel like knocking on their doors and slapping them. So I joined twitter.

I thought twitter would be different. Twitter would be more....intellectual. There are no stupid video sharings, No stupid applications, No stupid games. It would be pure aggregation of interesting information, intelligent opinion and a place to expand your knowledge.

I heard the warning bells ring when I observed that an ever-present-entity in the trending topic list is a 15 year old Canadian singer who sounds like a girl and dresses like a gay. Surely you can't expect much from a place populated by Justin Bieber fans!

And my fears were true. It turns out twitter is no better than facebook in terms of its retard quotient. So I took the pains to segregate the moronic population of twitter into different groups.

Here is how it goes:

Diary Writers:

Somehow these guys got this idea that twitter is your pubic online diary. So they update it with the most boring facts of their every day life. A typical twitter feed looks like this.

Woke up at 8'0 clock. OMG, I will be late for office!

In the metro. Gosh, its so crowded!

Just reached the office, hope the boss doesn't notice i am late. LOL!

Had a sumptuous lunch . feeling sleepy.

Logging off the comp. Back to home now :)

Watching 'My name is khan' now. Sharukh is the greatest actor in the world.

Okay. Hitting the sack. good night Tweeps! sweet dreams.....

Seriously, I don't mind tweeting your life as long as it is interesting and full of adventures, like Indiana Jones. But it is seldom the case with these tweeters. They might as well stick a note on their foreheads saying " i have the most boring life possible!"

Celebrity Hunters:

I find these creatures the most annoying thing about twitter. Their mission is to follow as many celebrities as possible and respond to every mundane thing those shit heads tweet.

A typical time line...

@Iamsrk your movie is too good,man. Keep rocking!

@realpreityzinta Why aren't you doing any movies, We are all missing you dear!

@chetan_bhagat I loooooove ur books. and don't worry. We all support YOU!

@Beingsalmankhan Welcome to twitter, sir! Itna der kyon kar diya aane mein? LOL!

@shahidkapoor What are the new movies you are doing??

Retweeters:

Okay, they are not exactly annoying. But they make me feel pity for them. These guys doesn't have absolutely any thing original to say, and all they do is to retweet the interesting tweets of the people they follow.

Quoters:

These guys are somewhat overlapped with the retweeters category. Their timeline consists of nothing but the lame ass quotes of over rated self help gurus, famous philosophers and done to death platitudes about life.

RT @paulcoelho Joy is contagious, lets spread this virus! (my reaction: No shit, sherlock!)

RT @Deepakchopra Coincidences are anonymous gifts that point to a deeper reality (my reaction: What the fuck does that mean,seriously!)

Life is not the number of breaths you take. its the number of moments that take your breath away!

Yester day is a cancelled check. tomorrow is a promissory note. Today is an unopened gift. That is why it is called...... 'PRESENT'.

Fraandshippers

Of course, any form of social platform is incomplete without this category. But twitter is a boon for the fraandshippers because you don't need others to accept your fraandship. So, you can go full throttle on your own.

@divya K Hey, beautful, where are u from? shall we be frands?

@chaitu123 Hey, are u male or female, its so confusing yaa.....

@Priyatweets Hey darling, very good looking you. wanna make frandship with me??

@Aashadev LoL, you are too funny yaa, Gimme your phone number, I wanna know you more!

Bandwagonists:

And finally, the least annoying of them all. People who heard great things about twitter; read about it in some paper or heard sharukh khan was on it; created an account, got bored and completely forgot about it! They tweet once in about three or four months, just to, I don't know, to satisfy themselves that they are not missing out on the latest 'in' thing.

but, frankly, I prefer their approach to tweeting rubbish, like the dairy writers do.

Now, this list is in no way exhaustive. I thought of at least 17 types of twitterbugs, but forgot to note them down. And I can't seem to recollect them now.But enough hatred for one post, I think. I will update any new categories i can think of.

Keep sucking guys, or else I will run out of things to make fun of......

MAD!

Disclaimer: If this post seems like a poor collection of haphazardly constructed sentences, it is because I am writing this while listening to the songs of balakrishna's epic movie 'Simha'. Not because I am a talentless dork who thinks he is funny. I know I am awesome.

****************************************************************

Defining moments. Every man's life will have a bunch of them which will change the course of his life forever. When I say man, I mean man. I don't know about women and I don't want to speculate. But probably their most defining moment is when they lay their eyes on that beautiful pink prada bag or something. Yeah, I am a MCP.

Coming back to man and his defining moments, you would think that these are very personal and different for different people. They are, if you are noble prize winner or something. For all other good for nothing every day jacks like you and me, they are fairly common and predictable.

They go something like this:

- first bully fight in school

- first time you became aware of your "thing" and its many, um,undiscovered functions

- your first drink/cigarette/drugs/other crazy shit youth do that i've no idea about

- your first love are u effing kidding me? Its as much a defining moment as your first potty training. get over it!

- first kiss

- first time sex I've it on expert authority that this is highly over rated and mostly awkward experience.

- first appraisal on job

- first time some one calls you uncle instead of 'bhaiyya'

- your slow, painful, inevitable death

No, I didn't skip any between the last two items. That is what I feel. Once you are called an 'uncle', all that is left in your life is to wait for the sweet cold embrace of the grim reaper.

And that happened to me today!

I was standing in the Rajiv chowk metro station today, on my way to watch LSD. I was examining the route map when I first heard that fateful word

I couldn't believe my ears.

I couldn't believe my eyes either.

Because its not some 4 year child who called me that dreadful word. Its a gang of some 12 year old giggling girls.

They asked me something about the train schedule, but my mind freezed in that moment. It kept playing "that" word in my head like in a b grade hindi film.

Uncle?

Uncle???

I've no idea how i watched the movie and returned home.

I know I am not exactly a fashion icon. My wardrobe leaves much to be desired. Clean underpants and stainless shirts if you want me to be specific. But still, I think it is unacceptable that I should be addressed as "uncle".

So I've decided to do the most sensible and fruitful thing to do.

I am writing an open letter to all the women of delhi through my blog. The fact that the female reader count of my blog borders on zero will not deter me!

So, here it goes:

Dear delhi girls, especially those bird brained giggly teenage types:

I am not a 'uncle'. This is what an average 'uncle' looks like.

On the other hand, this is how me and other average 23 year olds look like.

So, stop f**king calling me UNCLE or else I will catch hold of each one of you and explain in detail

the history and significance of string theory! And believe me, you wouldn't want to know that!

Kthxbai

ALL WE ZOMBIES

Keeping up with my Scroog-ish attitude, I've vowed to stay away from Holi celebrations in the campus. But apparently, you can stay away from holi, but Holi won't stay away from you. Sooner or later, just when you begin to think you are safe, it knocks on your door...

Having Gone through all the phases of knowledge,loathe,irritation,observance, passive resistance, active participation and exhilaration, i can tell you this: This is as closest I've ever experienced the zombie apocalypse!

The symptoms look rather innocuous at first. People walking along corridors, smiling at each other, applying colors on each other. Perfectly alright.

The stage 2 looks a bit menacing. Some where, some one gets this idea that throwing people into the mud would be a great idea. And it spreads like wild fire! Before you know it, you are lifted into air, and plunged into the mud. you are dragged all over the place in the mud.

The final stage is sheer madness. People start tearing up each other's clothes. No, really. No mercy. No exceptions. People were stripped down to their bare minimums and the mayhem continues.

Apart from the phases of symptoms, another reason why i compare this to Zombie phenomena is the change in attitude you experience. You may hate Holi, you may loathe all the hoopla surrounding it, but once you were bitten, i,e were thrown into the mud pond, you will inexplicably engulfed by an urge to infect more victims. Without knowing, you will become the zombie you detested minutes back....

Of course, unlike the Zombie apocalypse, this lasts only till afternoon, and sanity prevails by the evening. But the muddy rooms, teared up clothes hanging from trees and the traces of color that refuses to be washed off will still remind you of the mayhem that ruled the morning!

Sangeek calling Sangeek

Time: 5:00 AM

Place: An undisclosed room of an undisclosed hostel of an obscure B-school

Trrrrrrrring.... Triiiiiiiiiiing...

Sangeek: hello....

Other side: Good morning, sangeek...

Sangeek: who r u?

Other side: Didn't recognize my voice? I am Sangeek speaking....

Sangeek: Sangeek?? whoddafock?

Sangeek 2: Surprised,aren't you?

Sangeek: OMG! Are u calling from the future?? Am i talking to my future self??

Sangeek 2: Duuude, this is why you aren't getting laid! Shut your geeky mouth and listen!!

Sangeek : ....... Okay.

Sangeek 2: I am gonna change your life,bro! I know you have crush on that girl in finance. I am gonna tell you what you need to do to make her fall for you, I...

Sangeek: Thnx, but no thnx!

Sangeek 2: Wat??

Sangeek: I don't want to talk to her. I would rather stalk her on facebook and stare at her from a distance.

Sangeek 2: Duuuuuude, what the shmuck are you talking? Y don't you want to talk to her??

Sangeek 1: You see, for me,she is the manifestation of everything pristine and beautiful in this world.

Sangeek 2: yeah, so??

Sangeek : But the problem is, I am a chronic cynic. I hate this world and almost everything in it. I firmly believe that the human race should be exterminated by a meteorite. I find people either incredibly stupid or incorrigibly arrogant.

Sangeek 2: So??

Sangeek : Don't you get it? The reason I am able to love her is that I don't know anything about her. I've never spoken to her, I've never heard her speak, for that matter. For all I know, she can be as intelligent as Ayn Rand or as annoying as Priyanka Chopra!

Sangeek 2: ........

Sangeek: But it will no longer be the case when I start speaking to her. I may find her boring, I may find her dumb,I may find her mean! She may not turn out to be the 'angel' I made her in my mind.

Paradise might be lost all over again, in my head!

Sangeek 2: That's crazy talk! What if you actually like her? Aren't you gonna regret not taking the chance??

Sangeek: Even If I DO like her, that's not gonna stay like that forever.Love fades over time.familiarity kills wonder. What if, in future, I no longer find my self drawn towards her as i am now? The mere fact that i may stop loving her makes me sick. So I decided that I would rather make this a perfect memory than a disappointing reality!

Sangeek 2: So,basically, your love story is Dead On Arrival??

Sangeek: I would rather think of it as avoiding inevitable tragic ending.

Sangeek 2: You're messed up!

Sangeek: But....

Sangeek 2: STFU! I am hanging up......

Click.....................................

***All the characters are fictional beyond reason and doubt, including the girl in finance!***

THE LONELY TREE

I was walking in the amphi, listening to the music of crushed dry leaves under my bare foot. It was an exhilarating experience. Autumn is under rated! For some reason, people doesn't find it appealing. Well, not me!

I sat down on the steps, watching the leaves fall down from the trees surrounding me. Have you ever watched a falling leaf? It dangles from the tip of the branch precariously, a whiff of the wind is all it takes for it to start its earthly descent. It swirls, sways and dances to the tune of the wind as if celebrating its own death! Looking at all the trees around me, with bare twigs and branches, I felt like an intruder in nature's dressing room. Autumn may look ugly to some, but for me it is the most beautiful thing.

I stood up and walked into the ground. At the end of the ground is the building which is open for all around the clock but inhibited by only a handful of geeky souls. In the middle of the ground,almost incongruous in its presence, is a big lonely tree.

Its strange, isn't it? To call a tree lonely? I don't know why, but every time I look at it, the phrase automatically comes to my mind. Our campus is full of greenery. Stand any where,look in any direction, and you will find grass and trees. The trees are often in clusters, with every tree brushing the branches of another tree. This lonely tree is the single aberration, standing in the middle of no where.It is in a place full of other trees, and yet, it is far away from any of them. Sometimes I wonder how it must be feeling....

Is it sad that it is lonely?

Or is it content because it stood out from the rest?

I've a feeling that the day I find the answer to this question, my quest for happiness might end!

HATE LIST

Full disclosure: I am a borderline sociopath who is two stupid forward mails away from going on a crazy killing spree. I hate people.The sight of the world depresses me to no end. So it was only a matter of time before i came up with my own "Hate list".

What depresses me the most is this list covers 95% of the people I know.

Disclaimer: I use the word HATE liberally. Whenever I use it, it could mean anything among irritating,disgusting,depressing,funny,stupid,crazy and of course, hate. Figure it out for yourself.

Also, Please note that this list is in no way exhaustive. People are very creative when it comes to pissing me off. Also, there are some categories which can't be hated enough in two lines and deserve a separate post.

So, Without further delay, here's my hate list:

****************************************************************************

people who write www.yahoo.com as "my webpage" in Orkut. Or people who write "my wedding date or my birthday" for the question: Your ideal date. These morons shouldn't be allowed to breed. I am NOT joking!

People who send 'fraand' requests to random girls. Seriously, How lame can people be?

people who start their conversation wth "sup dude?". Guess what Salinger would have called them?

People with ridiculous mail ids like princecharming4u@gmail.com - GTFO!

People who send chain messages like "send this to 8 ppl and ur love will kiss u on nearest possible friday!" or "Bill gates is sharing his wealth" mails.Seriously, how dumb you have to be to forward that crap?

Slactivists who delude them selves into thinking that they are actually serving the society by posting their bra colors on facebook or wearing green clothes on environmental day

newly wed girls who set their profile pic to "her with husband's hand on her shoulder". Its plain irritating for some inexplicable reason...Its like announcing to the world"Look at me bitches! Look how happy i am! I am married, muhahahaha!". Please note that i've no problem watever things they upload into their photo albums. Its the profile pic that bugs me!

people who figuratively use the word "literally". The most depressing part is when you see this in newspapers and books!

People who posted "all izz well..." in their status msgs or use it in their conversations. Too much exposure. Too predictable. I don't know why but it drives me crazy. Its just mega lame!

People who post personal msgs as their status msgs which they were too afraid to say to other people directly.

Eg: Why are you annoyed at me?? :(

I don't know?? You fucking ask that person!

People who play farmville/mafia wars on facebook. Dont ask why.They just depress me!

People who use "cool","lol","ROFLMAO" in every second phrase they write

On a related note, People who write " I am a cool and friendly guy" in their "about me"s.

Girly girls who demand attention,like shopping,want to be protected, and looooooooooooove 'Edward Cullen'. Hey girls! Here's a heads up: princecharmings doesn't exist! get real!!

People who think they read books because they've read chetan bhagat and sidny sheldon!

People who list "watching movies","Chilling out with friends" as their activities in orkut and fb.

People who fervently discuss question paper after exams and try to outwit each other with arguments like "I got 22 marks, you got 22.5. ergo, u are a genius!" We are in a fucking B-school,Dorks! Not in 8th grade!!

People who think loving India is equal to hating Pakistan.

*****************************************************************************

If you find your self in the list, Congratulations. You are a normal person. And you are probably considered as a "Cool guy" by your peers.

If you are not there, Well, wait till the next list!

P.S: You might have observed that the list is dominated by social networking references rather than real life. Thanks to my Scrooge-ish behavior coupled with my social awkwardness, My social circle can be literally counted on fingers. Yes, literally, not figuratively. So i had no choice but to turn to internet for hating people. Kthxbai

The catcher in the MBA

The clock struck 12'0 clock.The music has started. I looked out of the window and saw people assembling around amphi for the party.

I sighed and connected my head phones and hoped they were strong enough to drown out the mayhem due outside.

It was the culmination of Chakravyuh, our college's sports festival. It was supposed to be a big deal and all, but i find it utterly uninteresting.But i guess its okay, since i got holidays for three days, and you can't have too many of them, can you??

This parties kill me. People are weird enough without getting drunk, but they get absolutely unbearable on these occasions. Add to that the stupid dancing they all do in groups, i feel like puking....

Let me be honest, I've been there and done that stuff, but i was stupid.Just like those people out there right now.I removed the headphones and shut down my laptop. My feeble headphones are no match for the what must be a goddamn gazillion watt sophisticated sound system out there.

I wore my sweat shirt and walked out of the hostel. I didn't feel much cold, but i wore the sweat shirt anyways. These people give me weird looks if you step out without all this winter gear.You are supposed to be shivering,rubbing your hands for heat and crib about how cold the weather is and all that stuff. Or else they say something moronic like," u southies have a rough skin!" Phonies!!

The music got louder and louder as i approached the amphi. As i was passing it, some guy stopped me and tried to get me dancing.

"Swell man, but I am going to library!" I said.

You would think he would end the discussion and leave me and all, but no!

"Duuuuuuuuuuuude!", he moaned. "Y the hell do u want to go to library??"

"Because not a single thing about this party interests me, Not the crappy bollywood songs u play, not the alcohol, and not that goddamn dance. Thats why"

"You seriously need some girls in your life, man!" he said.

"Thanx. But I think an intelligent conversation now and then with a non-moronic person will do" I said and left. I bet he didn't understand a word i said.

When i entered the library, the librarian looked at me like he was looking at a ghost. The library was dead empty, almost all the lights were switched off. I went to a shelf and took HBR and started reading. For a few blessed minutes, i forgot about all the phonies around me!

But the noise out side increased to such an unbearable limits that even the walls of the library aren't enough to stop it. The librarian, apparently, has no problem with it. I threw the book away, and walked out of the library. This is going to be a long night.

As i approached the amphi again on my way back to the hostel, i looked at my watch. Its almost 3AM. I took a sudden diversion and sat on the upper steps. These idiots wouldn't let me sleep, i might as well sit there and observe their lame phony behavior.

The amphi is full of drunken people swaying their bodies in random directions to the music. I don't know why they are dancing, and i dont think they don't know either. This DJ, stops the music suddenly at the popular phrases, and the crowd starts singing along those lines. It was supposed to be uber-cool and all, but i tell you, It's really depressing, if you ask me.

Then this DJ guy plays an supposedly emotional number, which talks about the greatness of friendship, the pain of leaving your friends and all that shit. Then all these phonies would start hugging each other and get all emotional and stuff. I kid you not! Its like they are living for each other and couldn't live without each other and like that. These are the guys who bitched,back stabbed each other all these months and wouldn't recall each others names after ten years.Now,hugging each other like they are some goddamn lovers! Its the phoniest thing you will ever see, I tell you!

Then it got worse. The power went off. Then everybody took out their cell phones and all and started swaying them as it its the most creative idea in the world. I felt like puking. i couldn't withstand the phoniness for another minute. I started going back to the room, on the way, some guy is yelling at another, "Waaadddup man, Swell party, huh??"

GODDAMN PHONIES!

PS: To salinger, who introduced me to my own story, for helping me understand who i am....

Based on a true story!

Setting: A first year class in a reputed bschool in NCR.

Class: Human Resource Management

Professor: The major issue faced by HR managers are under performing employees and over performing employees...

Class: reading ET,browsing their laptops,sleeping, doing pretty much everything but listening. Because, come on, HR is the mother of all the things boring in this world!

Professor: There are many ways to deal with unsder performing employees: Salary cuts, training or separation.

Class: Still doing the same things mentioned before

Professor: The real dilemma comes with the over performing employee. How do u deal with them? If we maintain the status quo, his morale will decrease....

Class: ........

Professor: You see, there are two ways to deal with this problem. First is to increase the amount of work he is doing. Second way is to increase the variety of work he is doing.i.e, increase his responsibility! For example, if he is area sales manager, give him another area to manage...

At this point, a naive student gets curious. He is a chronic dilbert fan, you see...

Naive student: Um, We will be paying him more for this additional responsibility, right??

Professor: Whaat? That's crazy talk! Money isn't the only motivator for the employees. They dig this responsibility stuff! It's a prestige issue!

Naive student: Let me get this straight. When an employee's performance exceeds expectations, our master plan is to give him more and more work such that his performance will fall back to our expectations??

Professor: Well, when u put it in that way....

Student: I feel soooo EVIL..........

p.s: The sad part is that this stuff is actually written in the text books.....

Anguish,Irritation and Lust

Went to Amritsar. No. I won't bore you with the details of how amazing the places I visited are or what i've eaten or how much i enjoyed. Thats just plain predictable. Instead i will just make three points...

1. What kind of sick psychopaths would pose for pictures at Jallionwalabagh?? I mean, you are standing in the exact location where 1500 people were brutally shot dead, and what do you do when you visit that place? You stand beside the wall with all the bullet marks and smile for the picture. You point your finger into the well into which people jumped out of desperation and say to your friend,"take a picture while i look all sombre and sad"

GIVE SOME RESPECT TO THE DEAD, YOU FUCKING RETARDED SONS OF BITCHES!!

2. What the shmuck is happening at the Wagah border? I thought the famous ritual of parade of jawans was supposed to indicate peace and friendship. It is to give a glimpse of the other side of border to common public. If we see the people from pakistan sitting on the other side, cheering their country just as we do, If we do our jawans doing the same march as theirs,may be we start thinking about pakistan as a country instead of a monster.

What is happening over there?? The commander or general or whoever is conducting the whole ritual is encouraging the audience to hoot and howl whenever some announcement come out of the other side of the border. The mindless sheep didn't need much prodding to go all "Boo" on our neighbors. People are showing rude symbols and shouting insults targeting the green flag bearers.If only they were let loose, i am sure thy will run across the border and start a riot.

Frankly, i am ashamed that i was a part of that barbaric behavior, even as a spectator! There are weak moments in my life sometimes when i feel that my irritation with mankind is unjustified, but then, incidents like this dispel those doubts and makes me wanna kill myself again!

3. On a tangentially related and considerably light hearted note, nothing looks hotter on a chick than army uniform. Wait, let me rephrase it. Only NOTHING can look hotter on a chick than a army uniform ;-)

We followed the army truck right to the mothership,i.e, female army quarters, and i was in half a mind to jump over the wall and proclaim my eternal lust for them,but we had a train to catch. More over, i am not really a champion at jumping walls!

Thank u hot army chicks! In this world of perverts and mindless cattle as above, you are one of very few reasons why i am still sane....

OPEN BOOK

Okay.... successfully screwed up another exam. Gotta study for OB2.

oh, wait. Tomorrow's exam is open book!

Great! Time to study economics, I don't know sh*t about that subject.

Lets start after few minutes of pointless surfing and refreshing mail box in eternal hope of receiving an useful mail.

Hmm.... Exorcism of Emily Rose. Plot is interesting.

Must... watch...movie.....

Holy shit! Its dinner time already!

No tensions,bhai. Kal open book hai!

Dinner sucks. Another twenty bucks spent on junk food.

Okay... Let us start OB.

Innovation and change, types of....

Holy Fucking God! Today is HIMYM's 100th episode!

May day! Abandon book! I repeat, Abandon book.

After all, tomorrow's open book!

Where am I? Oh,yeah, Organizational life cycle,culture....

Booooooooooooooooring!

you tube - search - penelope cruz lesbian kiss

*drool*

Bureaucracy, change leadership,blah blah.

OOO... a pointless flame war with generous mud slinging going on in the class mail group, time to contribute to the spam.

Wait, i almost forgot watching the latest episode of Big bang thoery!!!

Politics, power, organizational...

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn!

Satan's balls! Its already 2AM.

Feeling sleepy, man!!Kal dekhlenge yaar, Open book hi hai!

The saddest part is i know i am gonna regret this tomorrow in the exam. But hey, wats the fun in open book if you study the day before?